So today I want to talk to you about love, most importantly, self-love. And I know some of you are thinking, well, Bailey, why are we talking about love? You were the purpose coach. Well, I want you to know love is the main thing that you will need in order to walk in a purposeful life.

Why Are We Talking About Love on a Purpose Podcast?

Because love, especially self-love, is one of the main ingredients for living a purposeful life. If you’re wondering what self-love has to do with your God-given purpose, keep reading (or hit play). It may be the missing piece you didn’t realize you needed.

God commands us to love Him with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. But the second greatest commandment is just as important: “Love your neighbor as you love yourself.” That means loving others starts with loving ourselves—biblically and boldly.

God is not calling you to love your kids, spouse, or friends more than you love yourself. That’s not sacrifice—that’s burnout. Biblical love honors God’s order: love Him first, then learn to love yourself, so you can love others well.

Why Self-Love Matters to Your Purpose

When you ignore your own needs in the name of service, you’re not walking in love—you’re walking in disobedience. Just like on an airplane, you have to put your own oxygen mask on first. If you can’t breathe spiritually, emotionally, or mentally, you can’t help others thrive either.

Self-love gives you clarity. It helps you hear from God. It positions you to steward your gifts, protect your peace, and walk boldly in your calling. That’s why it’s a critical foundation for purpose-driven living.

Fruit of the Spirit Starts with Love

Let’s not forget: the very first fruit of the Spirit is love. That includes how you treat yourself. If you’re struggling with boundaries, toxic relationships, or poor self-worth, it’s time to pause and reflect:

• How are you loving yourself today?
• How have you loved yourself in the past?
• How will you love yourself in the future?

Sometimes society—and even well-meaning Christians—make self-love sound like self-idolatry. But loving yourself is not putting yourself in the center. It’s following the divine order: God first, then a healthy love for who He created you to be.

Take a Soul Check Today

Black girl, today I challenge you to pause. Take a breath. Ask yourself: Am I loving myself in a way that honors God’s word? Because when you do, you’ll not only thrive—you’ll begin to choose the right relationships, set healthy boundaries, and fully step into the purpose God designed for you.

And remember—when someone asks you to do something that doesn’t serve you well, say it with love and clarity: “That is not my ministry.”

Love You!

A Quick Word for the Woman Feeling Stuck

Alright, Black Girl, let’s pause real quick.

If you’ve been feeling unsure about your next move, stuck in a cycle of “almost” and “not yet,” or just know deep down that there’s more for you…You need my book:

Life Been Lifing: Don’t Be Distracted From Your Purpose

It’s a powerful (and easy!) read with mindset-shifting lessons and exercises to help you uncover your God-given purpose and walk in it boldly. Grab your copy at lifebeendlifing.com. Let this book be your guide to breakthrough.

About Bailey Orenia

With 20+ years as an entrepreneur and communications maverick, Bailey has empowered thousands through her unique blend of wisdom and relatability.

As an former XM Radio Host and BET.com pioneer, Bailey’s insights have been featured in The Washington Post, NBC, VISTAS Magazine, and more.

As author of “Life Been Lifing: Don’t Be Distracted from Your Purpose,” Bailey doesn’t just talk about purpose, she guides you through life’s chaos to find yours. Her no-nonsense approach cuts through the noise, offering clarity when you need it most.

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